Toodle Pip!

vintage-yoga-photos
Ah, Mary my dear, I’m so delighted you could make it. And I do love your hat. Is it designer?

Oh no Agatha, just something I cobbled together from one of the Count’s straw boaters and some Christmas decorations.

Yes, I can see that now. I was wondering about the tiny Santa perched on top. I thought it was an ironic comment on midsummer.

No dear, I was just having a sort out and thought I could combine an elegant look with a bit of glitter or ‘bling’ as I believe they say now. Still, there is nothing like being individual and going against the flow as dear Olive Croissant would say. Talking of whom, is she still running a home for stray cats dear?

I believe so dear one, but at this time of year one can’t get to her for fluff and it quite sets off my allergies all those cats moulting as they do.

Indeed Agatha. But, as it is the last time I shall be seeing you for a while I did think I’d make the effort.

Well it is heartily appreciated Mary, if somewhat random in style and it has boosted me rather when the sad day of your departure is nearing. One shall miss our tea and cake get togethers, and the shared stories, but in good tradition I shall still sip gin and raise a glass to you, wherever you may be.

How marvellous dear. But I shall be back from my travels in the twitch of a cat’s whisker. And, if it wasn’t for your responsibilities manning the jam stall at the WI summer fete I am in no doubt that you would be joining me in Bangkok.

Quite dear, I’d like to give those Lady Boys a run for their money, although I dear say Jonty would not approve if he were still with us! But what does worry me dear is the thought of that heat and humidity, you know the trouble I had with my thighs in Egypt.

Agatha dear, don’t you think that’s a tad dramatic? You coped perfectly well in the heat and caused quite the sensation when you dived into the Tiber.

As you say dear one, as you say. I’m sure I would acclimatise eventually. But (taking a sip of some strong cordial) I have been quite remiss and have forgotten to tell you that Binky has been released from his incarceration. I’ve been advised that he is taking the scenic route home and has hired one of those Ford vans and is travelling back to Blighty by land.

Goodness dear one, has he had some sort of road to Damascus conversion? I remember him as someone who would only set foot inside a Rolls, nothing else was good enough. And, how the Dickens you hear this?

Well, I don’t know about Damascus my dear but Mimsy Porpington-Smythe was really quite animated about his imminent return and so eager to let me know. I do believe she fears for his safety.

And will you be seeing the old devil Agatha dear? If he calls round?

Heaven forbid! No my dear, my heart is truly mended and I am now a happily confirmed spinster and luckily, in full possession of all my jewels. I wouldn’t want to risk losing them to his sticky fingers again.

But what if he is a reformed character? One never knows what prison can do to change one?

No, that is true. But it seems that Mimsy is rather taken with him and by jingo, she’s welcome to him. My mind is quite resolute, unlike our PM there is no U-Turn for me.

I do so admire your fortitude Agatha. I hope to show the same level of resolve when it comes to resisting some of the temptations afforded to me in Thailand.

Like what dear?

Well, as you know, this is not simply a jolly holiday; there’ll be no lounging around poolside with a Singapore Sling. No, this is about self improvement, opening my eyes to other cultures, embracing the new and all that.

Yes dear, but you really should take some time out you know. I do believe a little of what you fancy keeps you young at heart and ready to face whatever the day affords? After all, you are away for several months. You cannot be networking and improving your ‘downward dog’ postures for all that time?

Agatha dear, don’t fret. I have absolutely every intention of breaking some bad habits, but also to learn some better ones. I hope to become a fully qualified yoga instructor, learn some Thai Chi and perfect some authentic Thai cooking techniques. I have a tutor lined up already you know.

It does sound marvellous but also rather exhausting dear; but one word of advice – please please please ensure you take some solid construction in the bosom department with you. I’d hate for you to have a mishap at a yoga class!

Dear one, I’ve already been to see our dear friend Ethel at Rigby & Peller and they have promised that I can order online and anything I need will be despatched directly.

Very well dear but surely, at your age, you should be putting your feet up and gazing at the sun dipping below the sea over a large cocktail?

That’s what society would have us do dear, but no, I am quite determined on the matter. The Count will be egging me on of course. He has always fancied being married to a yoga teacher. I cannot for the life of me imagine why.

Can’t you dear? All that bending…in leotards.

Piffle. We don’t go in for that type of thing any more.

Maybe that’s why he’s so keen dear.

Really? I’d never thought of myself as a ‘Green Goddess’. But actually dear I am a tad nervous about the plane trip. Being squished together for ten hours with the Count will be challenging. I have my books of course, but he does tend to get a bit restless when we are in close proximity.

Perhaps you will be bumped up into first class dear. Make sure you wear your emeralds and a smart jacket. And ask the Count to don his crested blazer. Then it will be just a formality I’m sure.

Agatha, you are a darling. Of course arriving in style would be just topping, as long as we don’t get too tiddly on the bubbly of course and fall down the steps on arrival, that would just be unbearably inelegant.

I don’t fear that will happen my dear as you both seem to have a remarkable capacity for alcohol that I doubt a few glasses would make very much difference to your sense of balance, even after no sleep. Besides, you could always call for a wheelchair to help you on your way. Now, have you finished packing?

Goodness no! Poor Jenny is quite discombobulated by the entire thing. However, she has managed to lay out my new bathing costume. It does look enormous in the cup but quite nice on and keeps everything where it should be, which is quite simply a relief. And then I have all my linens. They do crease the moment you look at them, but I simply can’t imagine wearing anything else in the heat and humidity. I’ve decided that I will go for the ‘cool and crumpled’ look which I believe was so in a few seasons ago.

Well, the image of you wafting down the beach in Phuket in your normal commanding fashion will keep me going during the depths of our winter.

But what about you, dear one? Have you a trip planned for the summer this year?

Well, actually, yes. I have just booked a little sojourn abroad. There’s this totally charming little company that do spiffing little holidays for us ‘individual’ people – good company, good food and smart accommodation without being a source of pity for the smug married couples.

That sound perfect dear one. Where are you going. Italy? Greece?

Las Vegas actually, I thought I’d try my luck at Caesar’s and have dug out one of Bertie’s old pantomime hats. And, I’m thinking of brushing up on my singing before I go. I know I did always have an exceptional and distinctive voice at school, but I hear there are these er, open mike, sessions which seem to be all the rage. I thought I might do my Shirley Bassey while I’m there.

Goodness Agatha! For once I’m utterly speechless with admiration. You must send me photographs – I can just envisage you on The Strip in your slingbacks and a pink feather boa.

Oh dear, I’ve not worn slingbacks for years darling – I’d probably fall over, but anyway let’s just raise a wee dram to friendship and adventure.

Chin chin dear one. See you on the other side.

Advertisements

New Year, more cake

newyearcake

 

Mary dear how wonderful to see you looking so full of the festive vigours.  Do come through. Dorothy Lanesborough, Gussie Twot-Wickham and Javala are all in the lounge. We’re just reviewing the success of our belly dancing show at the Bishop’s Palace.

Ooh how delightful, I must say the Count was very impressed with everything.  He has been quite mute with admiration since, keeps asking me to show him some of my moves again.

So you’ve had a quiet Christmas then Mary?

Absolutely!  It’s been heaven (enters the drawing room with Agatha)  Darlings, how wonderful to see you all looking so vibrant.

Let me ring for Ethel and get us some more tea and some of that delicious mincemeat crumble cake that she’s been making for us.

Mary dear, how lovely to see you!   Have you quite recovered from your belly button jewel flying off and hitting the Bishop on the head?  I do believe he came over quite peculiar, but was soon brought round by some of Snetter’s special mulled wine.  

Oh Dorothy, yes it was a slightly un-nerving but I just didn’t want to upset the routine; particularly after Agatha had stunned so many of the audience with her amazing travelling hip swivels and alarming back bends.  

bellydancebend

Yes , I noticed the concentration on your face, Agatha.  I also noticed that most of the gentlemen were not actually looking at your face, they seemed to find you quite distracting!

Really, at my age.  What a load of tosh, Gussie!  

But, my dears, it was a truly magnificent evening and I can’t thank you enough.  If the figures are to be believed we have raised an astonishing sum for Refuge and we still have some of the auction money to count too.

Fabulous news Gussie.  With the added benefit that one found the whole experience of twirling semi naked in public totally liberating.  I, for one, feel we should all continue into the new year.

(there are cheers all round, and Ethel brings in more tea and cake.)

You know ladies, I do feel that the most invigorating thing about our belly dancing is the way it has changed my view of our bodies.

How so Agatha dear?

Well, I was reading this month’s Vogue and there is a refreshingly honest article about Ashley Graham who is on the cover.  

But, darling what on earth has this Ashley Graham got to do with us and our bodies?  She is young and beautiful.

Mary dear, I quite agree but Ashley Graham is a ‘Plus-size model on a mission to reshape fashion’ and wants us all to embrace our shape, whatever it is, and love ourselves.  There is a wonderful TEDX talk that covers all aspects of her size and how women are unable to say that they love themselves.  

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xAgawjzimjc

Oh yes, Agatha, I did read about this.  She really is quite inspiring and says that she looked up to her Mother who told her that she should love herself from within.  Apparently her mother would say ‘If you call yourself fat, you’re going to be fat, if you say you’re stupid, you’re going to be stupid’.  

By jove Mary she sounds an entirely inspirational woman and hasn’t fallen into the trap that of trying to perpetuate the media’s idea of the ideal shape which is, quite frankly, unattainable for many without causing damage to body and mind.

Quite dears, and we should not wait until we have reached our grand old ages to finally accept ourselves for who we are.  It’s terrible to think that young women and girls today wish they looked like someone else.  How many of us have looked back at photographs of ourselves in our teens and twenties and wondered how we ever thought we were unattractive or the wrong shape back then?

Oh yes Agatha, it’s such a waste of youth.  And as the wonderful late Carrie Fisher said

“We treat beauty like an accomplishment, and that is insane. Everyone in L.A. says, ‘Oh, you look good,’ and you listen for them to say you’ve lost weight. It’s never ‘How are you?’ or ‘You seem happy!'”

carrie-fisher-princess-leia-iii-by-dave-daring

So in her memory, let’s have another slice of cake and keep dancing!

Absolutely darlings!

mincemeatcake

http://www.waitrose.com/home/recipes/recipe_directory/m/mincemeat_crumble_cake.html

 

Life Love and Dirty Dishes

Hope and horses

gorilla

Mary my dear, how lovely to see you, and goodness you do look flushed.  Has the Count been making advances or are you just a bit wind beaten?

Agatha my dear, I am simply recovering from the onslaught of the Count’s relatives.  They  have finally left and I have been able to wander about in my own home without being accosted by Uncle Rasputin in the corridors. I had to wear my Barbour and Wellingtons indoors so I could make a hasty escape into the garden.   I spent a lot of time out in the grounds, hiding.  The elements certainly don’t help one’s complexion.  I feel as though I need a holiday to rejuvenate myself.

Why don’t you try one of these Mary,  Ethel has made some delightful little Financiers.

Do you mean tiny models of our lovely friend Derek who works in the City?

No dear.  They are French almond cakes.

How fabulous darling.  Yummy!

But I do agree with you about holidays dear.  It feels that Egypt and all the joys, and camels, were several years ago.   Now, do come into the drawing room, I ran into the lovely Dorothy Lanesborough last week and thought that we hadn’t had a good catch up with her for some time.  She’s quite an inspiration you know.

Goodness me, I haven’t seen Dorothy for over twenty years; she was quite the gal about town if I remember correctly.  Didn’t she go off to canoe down the Amazon for charity?  The last I’d heard she’d married the head of some remote Amazonian tribe.  Golly, it certainly will be good to catch up with her.

_47339956_kayak512

Yes, she was telling me all about them.  They are  the Nukak.  A terrifically ingenious but terribly endangered tribe.  I believe Dorothy has been helping to raise awareness of their plight at the hands of developers and drug lords

http://www.survivalinternational.org/tribes/nukak

Tell me Agatha (as they walk down the hall towards the Drawing Room), is Dorothy quite changed?

Oh Mary dear, if you mean has she gone native, no she’s perfectly well dressed, in a manly fashion, but she is less pale than she used to be, and her hair has gone quite blonde from the Amazonian sunshine!  In fact, despite her advancing years (sighs) she looks quite lovely.

Oh how absolutely ripping, I can’t wait to hear about some of her experiences.

(They both enter the drawing room to find Dorothy sitting perfectly on the chaise longue, the light silhouetting her form and making her hair glow).

Dorothy darling, how lovely to see you after all this time.

Blazes!  Mary you look perfectly spiffing.  Can’t remember how many millennia it’s been since I saw you.  Goodness, you do look positively blooming!

Err, thank you dear.  You look quite transformed.  Tell me, how was the Amazon?

Well my dear old gal, it’s just as you’d expect really – hot, humid, full of creatures of all sorts.  Life with the husband was lovely for a while, even though there was little we had in common and communication was extremely hard –  I did become quite adept with a bow and arrow, and making my own clothing.  I have brought back a suitcase full of interesting garments to see if I can raise some money.

More tea and another Financier Dorothy?

Coffee please, if you wouldn’t mind Agatha.  I’ve got so used to living without tea that I really don’t think I’ll ever go back – the bush tea that we had was positively dreadful – bark and a few dried leaves from some tree or other.  But the overall effect of eating fresh and natural foods has made a real difference to my health dear one!

I must say Dorothy, you are looking splendid.  In fact you haven’t aged a jot in the last twenty two years. Here you are (as Agatha passes her coffee and cake).  Now tell us, what you are up to at the moment?

Well, I was up in Wetherby the other day at the races and had a flutter on a filly called Actinpieces.  Blow me down she came in first!  But what’s more interesting is that she will not allow a male jockey to ride her.  She bites them sharply on the bottom if they try to mount her.

mred

Much like you with the Count, Mary dear.

Anyway.  This plucky mare got me thinking about setting up a stables that is purely for women – give the men a run for their money what?

Well Dorothy, that certainly sounds a marvellous idea.  After all darling Liz Taylor rode in the Grand National!

Agatha dear, that wasn’t real – it was a film with her and Mickey Rooney!

Balderdash!  So Dorothy dear, would you be donning your jodhpurs for this venture?  I can imagine you tearing down the gallops in gay abandon.

Quite possibly Agatha.  But actually,  my real reason for seeking a business opportunity is to support the Lullaby charity after my tragedy in the Amazon.

(Mary and Agatha sip their tea in silence, not sure what to say for once).

Dear husband and I were so delighted when our little girl arrived, she would be twenty today in fact.  But we were so cut-off from the latest thinking about how to best care for babies.   (Pauses)  Well, all I can say is I wish I’d been here to read about the wonderful work that lovely Anne Diamond did following the loss of her son twenty five years ago.  It may have saved  husband and I a great deal of pain.

(Together)  Dorothy dear, how dreadful for you.  I certainly remember the campaign and how simply putting children on their backs has saved so many from cot death.  It’s such a horrible way to lose a child, feeling that you should have been able to do something or done something differently.

Indeed my dears, but Anne was, and is, such an inspiration – turning all that anger and sorrow about her son’s death into such a positive cause, I wish I’d been able to do the same; but what can you do when you’re thousands of miles from civilisation and without a paddle!

Dorothy dear, you’re incredibly brave about it all.

Oh not really dear.  It’s just that stiff upper lip stuff that Pa drummed into me – I’ve got quite used to hiding the pain after all these years.  Can’t torture myself with going there any more, but it doesn’t mean I’ve forgotten, (pauses)  But I do hope that when I pass, I’ll see my beautiful daughter again; I’m hoping she’s waiting for me, ready to show me the way.

(All three sit in silence, in tribute to all those lost)

Mary dear, wouldn’t we be able to add her charity to the Bishop’s Christmas Show fund?  We could do two sessions of belly dancing – one to support Refuge

http://www.refuge.org.uk/

and one for Lullaby

https://www.lullabytrust.org.uk/ 

What’s that old fruit?  You both do belly dancing?

Well, Mary is slightly better at it than me – she has much more of a rhythmic control of her bosom; but I’m not too bad when it comes to the leg department.

Is this something you’d consider Dorothy?

By Jove, ab-so-lute-ly my dear ladies!  One is always keen to try out new things you know! Maybe it’ll help tone up the old lower regions so I can get into some decent jodhpurs!

Oh how marvellous, you can join Agatha and me next week.  I believe Javala will be quite open to having a new victim, err, participant.

That’s completely spiffing dear ones.  Now, did I tell you about the time I discovered the joy of topless weaving…..?

financier

recipe:

How to make French financiers

3 Little Buttons
Life Love and Dirty Dishes

Twirling and Whirls

feetdancing

Agatha dear I feel quite invigorated after our first belly dancing lesson.

It was exhilarating Mary, exhilarating.  I feel quite 72 again.

I really was impressed with the ability of my new brassiere to hold everything in place – there were plenty of moments which could have resulted in a wardrobe malfunction.

Indeed Mary dear, it was quite a relief for all of us I’m sure.  Viennese Whirl?

Ooh please, how delicious.  Wasn’t Lucia Pintworth a gem – quite stunning in her crimson silk pantaloons,  she was the spit of that lovely Karen Clifton from Strictly, I thought.  And a youthful 59, if I understood her correctly.

Surely not, by the way she was bending backwards in such a supple fashion she can’t be more than 42.  But didn’t she marry Maxim as a result of a holiday romance when he was on a Grand Tour?

Goodness, I didn’t think anyone went on a Grand Tour nowadays dear one, well apart from those terribly rude Top Gear boys.  Anyway, there is a little more to the story of how Maxim met Lucia.  Did you not hear about the unpleasantness between him and Fortescue Warboys?

Really, Mary?  I am quite in the dark as to any kerfuffle between Max and Forty.  

Well,  some years ago he and Fortesque had a colossal ding dong at one of their table tennis tournaments in our games room. Maxim got quite out of hand, bordering on the violent.  As a result they smashed the display cabinets in the Count’s games room and nearly took out his favourite stuffed Parrot.  In fact, the dear old fruit was certain that there was going to be pistols at dawn!

Goodness Mary, I do believe your husband can get quite carried away sometimes!  I can imagine his Italian blood quite on fire at two English Toffs smashing their ping pong balls about and getting into a tizzy.

ping-pong-match-1922-jpg-838x0_q80
That is true dear, I had to calm him down with several large glasses of Chianti.  But the whole episode was really about Maxim wanting to marry Fortesque’s cousin, and dear old Forty went into a total fizz about the whole thing, protesting that Maxim was only after the Fabergé snuff box that the Tzar had supposedly given her.  Trouble was everyone, except Fortesque and Maxim, knew it was a fake!

He sounds too much like Binky dear, and we all know how that ended.

Yes Agatha dear!  Anyway, Maxim was shipped off to stop him from interfering and quite frankly at 78 he really was becoming a bit of a liability – (whispering) too many dalliances with the servants so they say.  So in Italy he met the delightful Lucia.

And such an asset she has turned out to be.  She has certainly calmed Maxim down, but she talks nineteen to the dozen and I think he just lets it wash over him, can’t understand more than one or two words of what she says.  Neither can I of course!

Well Agatha dear, I may have a solution to that, and it really is quite exciting when I think about it.  

I can see that dear.  You look positively overcome, fit to burst.  Tell me then, while I pour the tea.

Well, I’ve been thinking about this for some time now.  I’ve been reading articles about teaching yourself new things to stimulate the brain and stave off dementia.  So, I’ve decided to go back to School!

Oh Mary dear isn’t that a bit radical?  I don’t believe St Margaret for the Pure of Heart isn’t quite the same now.  I understand it’s a comprehensive and really quite modern!  And, erm, not wanting to put too fine a point on it dear, aren’t you a little old for gymslips and satchels now?  Although I must say you can’t beat a pleated skirt and a nice blazer – they’re quite ‘on trend’ this season I believe.

Oh Agatha sometimes you are just too old fashioned!  I have no intention of going back to my Almer Mater, I’m enrolling in one of those delightful online learning courses which means I can do everything from the luxury of my own home.  And besides, you know perfectly well what happened the last time I wore a gymslip and had to hang onto those bars in some kind of arcane ritual…

gymschool

Golly yes, but you did look most decorative dear heart.  But anyway, what on earth has possessed you to take on this challenge dear?

Well, you know that The Count and I just about rub along due to the differences in our languages?  Well,  recently I have found myself wanting to have chats with the dear chap around subjects that are a little more in depth than one or two ice cubes in my G&T.  So, I am learning Italian!

How confusing dear, it means I won’t be able to understand either of you!  Don’t you think this is all a bit much Mary?  I mean we’re only just back from Egypt, and most of the time I had to get by with sign language and some charades – goodness know what language they were speaking!

I do believe it was English, Agatha.

Well, yes, but I struggled to understand our guide at the Goddess Temples in Luxor.  So at our age, do you think it’s possible to learn a new language?

I do believe that women – even chaps – can turn their hand to anything at any time of their life Agatha.  After all we hadn’t been belly dancing until tonight and look at the progress we’ve made – you managed to get your tassels twirling most becomingly.  Besides, the lovely people at Future Learn – the online education people – let you go at your own speed.  

Well if you must dear, but it’s all a bit beyond me I’m afraid.

Oh but Italian is such a wonderful language, and besides, I can now successfully order a glass of white wine – “Vorrei un bicchiere di vino bianco”

Oh, it sounds so much more sophisticated in Italian – I’m transported to the old days of elegant sipping and cocktail dresses *sighs*  

prince-and-showgirl

I know, so romantic is it not.  But that’s just the start of course.  It’s totally super that after just one lesson I can ask The Count for two different types of tipple!  Now I need to learn how to say “Please may I have another Viennese Whirl”

Free online language courses:

https://www.futurelearn.com/courses/categories/languages-and-cultures

marys_viennese_whirls_96895_16x9

Viennese Whirl recipe:

http://www.bbc.co.uk/food/recipes/marys_viennese_whirls_96895

 

3 Little Buttons
My Random Musings
Life Love and Dirty Dishes

Agatha and Mary’s Egyptian Odyssey/3

Part Three – Celebrate your Inner Goddess!

(over a rather large breakfast of fresh fruits, yoghurts, flat breads, and various types of eggs)

Goodness Agatha, what on earth did the Captain discover?  I mean, I can’t believe Binky followed you all the way to this luxury cruiser in Egypt, incognito, just to out of sheer devotion?

Oh Mary dear, do stop wafting your bosom around as though it was a major calamity…. It appears that darling Binky was up to his old tricks again and couldn’t bear to be parted from me….

But Agatha, you must surely admit that he would have sunk to the bottom of the Nile if you hadn’t rescued him – his pockets and knapsack were laden with your jewels….I did hear from that rather overbearing German Countess that he was found in your cabin, tried to escape when he heard footsteps, but some unfortunate passenger opened their cabin door at the wrong moment and sent Binky flying over the railings and into the drink!

Yes dear, I suppose I need to finally own up to my foolishness.  But of course my dilemma is that whilst Binky may well have been of service in the – err – physical department, it now seems that he only pretended to adore me for my thighs, when really it was just my money and jewels.  I have been so blind Mary dear!

No, not blind, many women found him irresistible!  He did look quite a dish dressed as Hercule Poirot I thought, such a shame. Does this mean that things between you are finally over?

Yes, I am afraid so.  There is only so much pilfering of one’s beloved treasures that one can cope with.  

angelalansbury

But, dear one, don’t be so hard on yourself.  He has been totally charming and I believe given you a little unexpected joy in your vintage years…

Indeed he has dear, but I cannot bear to see the years of hard grafting that enabled me to purchase those wonderful jewels just brazenly ignored in a moment of greed.

Agatha dear, what do you mean?

Well Mary, as you well know us women have to fight for the same wage as men in the same roles.  Before I met Jonty I had worked jolly hard to attain a Senior Management role in the Agricultural Machinery business – tractors and so forth.  But I was aware that my wages fell well below my male counterparts, particularly that smarmy Charles Snodgrass who was certainly a few bales short of a combine harvester.  It always stuck in my craw.

Oh, that’s where you got your nickname Aggie the Rotavator – I always wondered!

No dear, that came from my time as Head of Jam at the WI – less said the better.  Anyway it seems that dear Binky could never understand how precious those hard-won rewards actually were.  He assumed the jewels had been lavished on me by my wealthy late husband.  I do think he saw himself as another Richard Burton – you know he gave her those fabulous emeralds and diamonds after they filmed Cleopatra don’t you?  Now she truly was a goddess and proof that a women of, shall we say, advanced years still has so much to offer.

Agatha dear. don’t get me started – there is that dreadful outmoded assumption that a women with property have been gifted it by a wealthy man!  Women do so much and quite frankly are just belittled by a state that is ruled by historic patriarchal values.  Then of course there is the whole age thing….

Quite, and when all is said and done, Mary,  Binky would never have treated me as an equal and never understood the injustices of the pay gap – or the attractions of an older woman.

So really dear one, you should have left Binky floundering in the Nile at the mercy of the crocodiles.

Perhaps dear (Agatha gazes down into the water)  It would have been an ignominious end for the cad!  

Ah, but fitting one might say!  Still, let’s throw off the shackles of doom and embrace this land that celebrates women and Goddesses.  I’m feeling quite Cleopatra after all that drama!

Yes Mary, I can see that you have unshackled your large frontage – you seem quite free and liberated today! and I must admit it would look splendid adorned with a few choice jewels.

Well, I normally encase my bosom in tweed, but it’s far too hot here, so loose linen is the order of the day, I’m not quite going full out bare breasted like those Queens of Ancient Egypt, not sure if the locals would be quite up to it!

hatsephut

Steady on dear one!  Anyway, some charming Americans at pre-supper drinks last night mentioned the tombs at Luxor, particularly the majestic Temple celebrating Queen Hatshepsut who was arguably the most successful Pharaoh Egypt has ever seen.  Did you know that she ruled for twenty years?

How fabulous and inspiring darling.  I think we would both have made fantastic ancient Queens ourselves, just think of all the jewellery and bathing in asses milk!

Might have been a bit whiffy in this heat one imagines.  Let’s step ashore at Luxor then,  I fancy poking about in an ancient tomb and admiring the artwork.  

Yes, lets celebrate our Inner Goddess – after the events of the last few days, Agatha, you have certainly earned the title!

Quite dear, let’s just hope we don’t meet any asps!  Tell me, is there any cake?

 

R is for Hoppit
3 Little Buttons
My Random Musings